In many cases, it can’t be easily detected, as sometimes the behaviour happens when nobody else is watching, such as in one-on-one meetings where the bully manager tells you that your performance is not good enough, even though you know you did a really good job and you were even praised by clients for it. In other cases, the bullying situation can affect the entire atmosphere in the workplace, when others see the behaviour but are too scared for their own job security to do anything about it.
Workplace bullying is a sneaky little monster, often cloaked in secrecy and sometimes only visible to its victims. You might find it lurking in one-on-one meetings where a bully manager dismissively tells you that your work isn't up to scratch, never mind the praise you received from clients last week. Or perhaps it’s in the way the office atmosphere thickens with tension, as your colleagues quietly watch the horror show but say nothing, fearing for their own job security.
Often in New Zealand, people will notice it and either say nothing or even contribute their own share of bullying, rather than trying to stop it, as a way to earn the bully manager’s grace. They can even come to the point of lying during an investigation of the bullying incident, in order to favour the bully manager. Victims often carry this burden home, nursing stress and anxiety that can bleed into every corner of their lives, dampening professional performance and souring personal relationships. It’s a lingering aftertaste that no amount of wine can wash away.
Now, you’d think there would be robust defences against such workplace horrors, right? Well, the policy framework in New Zealand can feel about as sturdy as a house of cards. Sure, there are laws and company policies that supposedly protect against bullying, but they often gather dust on HR’s highest shelves.
And if you muster the courage to report bullying, you’ll find the process can be as disillusioning as the bullying itself. With internal systems that sometimes seem designed more to protect the company's image than to address your grievances, and external bodies that move at the speed of a snail, it’s a gauntlet of its own. If you’re expecting a warm embrace from your employer, prepare to be disappointed. You might get a pamphlet about a support hotline or be directed to a tepid employee assistance program that offers the bare minimum.
Don’t get me wrong - there are genuine efforts out there, and some organisations handle bullying with the gravity it deserves. But for every one that does, there’s another that’s perfectly content to let their employees fend for themselves in a toxic jungle.
So, while workplace bullying remains a stubborn stain on the fabric of our work culture, remember this: you’re not alone, it’s not your fault, and yes, it really is that bad. It should be a shame for New Zealanders, trying to portray themselves as a progressive country and almost like a Disneyland for foreigners, when in reality it can become a nightmare and a source of PTSD, which can ruin careers, job satisfaction and lives.
The saddest part is that it is a result of an inferiority complex, the fear of people more qualified from overseas and just plain racism. It is quite dumb to bully people who know their job better than you do. It fosters mediocrity, encourages un-productivity and depresses everyone. It makes the country run backwards, just to defend your own laziness. Not clever at all.